Gender Dysphoria is some fresh hell that eats you from the inside, and it makes your skin feel too tight, and your face is stupid, and your body's all wrong, and your voice is shite, and did I mention how tight your whole skin suit feels?!! It doesn't matter how long you've been in transition, it doesn't matter how well you pass (or if you pass at all), it still keeps coming and you might look fine but it is actually gnawing on your from the inside until you're a blood pudding inside a human skin sack.

Normally this time Friday evening I go training, which helps a bit to get out of my own head. But of course we're in lockdown again and sportsclubs are closed, so I can't go punch my friends/get punched by them, and NO I'm not going out running in public - not when I feel like all eyes are on me and seeing me as some ugly lady with an unfortunate haircut. So it's my home and as many push-ups I can crunch but HELL I HATE THIS!